


Death Talks in All Caps

by PixelByPixel



Series: Death Takes a Holiday [5]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Azrael sticks up for Trixie, Big Brother Lucifer, Fluff, Fun with ringtones, Gen, Humor, Libraries welcome everyone, chocolate cake, even the Angel of Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 14:55:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10389297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PixelByPixel/pseuds/PixelByPixel
Summary: Finishing up a case with Chloe, Lucifer gets a call for assistance from his sister.





	

**Author's Note:**

> The title refers to Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, which is the book Azrael is reading. Highly recommended, even if Death is a guy. #librarian

Lucifer's phone sounded as he and Chloe exited the dilapidated apartment building; song lyrics were cut off as he answered. "Excellent timing, little sis. We just caught the bad guy." He listened for a moment, then queried, "Right, do you need bail money as well?"

The girl's exasperated response was audible even to Chloe, who laughed.

"Well, you can never tell," Lucifer said placatingly, though not without a wink to Chloe. "Yes. Soon as I can." He ended the call and tucked away the phone. "Rae says hello and asks you to please shoot me somewhere non-lethal, though if punishment is to occur, I have some alternatives I could suggest."

Shaking her head, Chloe queried, with an amused look, "What did she want?"

"Library card," Lucifer replied, getting into Chloe's car for the trip back to the station. "Apparently she's too young to get one on her own, so I need to go in and sign something." Taking his phone from his pocket, he added, amused, "Do you know, she reset my ring tones? She changed Amenadiel's into that whiny Superman song."

Chloe shot a sidelong look at her partner as she drove. "You like her," she accused.

"My sister?" Lucifer replied, sounding a little puzzled. "Well, yes. Should I not?"

Chloe laughed. "No, you absolutely should. She's a sweet girl. But how often do _you_ do something you should, something expected? I thought I'd hear endless complaints about her, and about your father for sending her."

"Touché, Detective," Lucifer replied, with a thoughtful smile. "Far be it from me to say that dear old Dad has actually made a good decision, but I'm enjoying having Rae here."

Chloe pulled the car into a spot. "Enjoying spending time with with a child," she teased. "Never thought I'd see the day. Have you heard anything about how long she's staying?"

"I've told you that she's not actually a child," Lucifer replied absently. "As for how long, of course not. Dad isn't talking, like usual."

Chloe shook her head. "I don't know the details, but he really needs to step up and be a parent," she said firmly.

Lucifer laughed, delighted. "Your lips to Dad's ears," he said, getting out of the car. "I don't see that happening, though. It never has before."

Chloe exited the car as well, with another headshake. "Well, Rae's welcome to come sleep over on Friday if she likes. I think Trixie's already asked her," she added. Lucifer took a breath and Chloe clarified, though not without a smile, "Just Rae."

"If you say so Detective," Lucifer replied, sounding a little nettled.

"I just don't think Trixie needs to hear your bedtime stories. You're welcome to come have breakfast with us on Saturday, though," she added, tone conciliatory. Chloe paused on the way into the station. "Did Rae set a ringtone for me?" she queried.

"What? Oh, I'm sure she did, but you've been texting rather than calling lately."

Expression curious, Chloe pulled out her phone and placed the call. A moment later, Marvin Gaye's smooth tones sounded from Lucifer's phone: _I've got sunshine on a cloudy day..._

Lucifer smiled. So did Chloe.

* * *

Lucifer adjusted his cuffs as he stepped through the sliding doors into the library. A passing staff member circled back to ask him, with a smile, "Can I help you find something?"

"Yes," Lucifer replied, his answering smile charming as ever. "I'm looking for a blond, about so high, dark eyes, deceptively sweet disposition."

The woman - who, incidentally, had dark hair - considered Lucifer with a somewhat disappointed look.

"My little sister," Lucifer clarified. "She asked me to meet her here."

The woman's expression cleared, and she smiled. "Oh, you mean Rae? Of course. What a lovely girl. Right this way." She led the way to the back of the library and pointed out Azrael, who was curled into the corner of an armchair, a stack of books on the table at her elbow. "She's got... interesting taste in books," the woman observed thoughtfully, before returning to her work.

"I'll just bet she does," Lucifer murmured. He hung back, taking a moment to watch his sister. She was completely absorbed in yet another book which, Lucifer saw, had an angel and a demon on the cover. "Perfect," he muttered.

Oblivious to any unspoken criticism of her reading material, Azrael pillowed her chin in her cupped hand, all but radiating amusement. She looked up suddenly, her gaze instinctively finding Lucifer, and her smile brightened. Fumbling for a bookmark, she hopped to her feet. "You'd like this one," she enthused. Seeing Lucifer's skeptical expression, she added, starting to take up the rest of her books, "Really. There's a part where they say you're not responsible for humanity's evil, that they produce it themselves. And I'm male _again_ , but I talk in all-caps, which is fun." 

"What's the premise?" Lucifer queried, interested despite himself.

"Impending apocalypse," Azrael replied, leading the way to the circulation desk, though she struggled a little with the books.

Lucifer followed. "And?"

Azrael grinned over her shoulder, though she didn't speak until she reached the desk and put down the books with a quiet oof. "I'm not telling. Read it yourself to find out."

The man behind the desk laughed. "That's the spirit. This your brother?"

Azrael nodded, rummaging in a pocket for a piece of paper. "You sign here," she instructed Lucifer. "It says-"

"Yes, I can read," Lucifer replied absently, scrawling his name as indicated.

The man behind the desk, took the form and offered Azrael a library card in exchange, which she signed. Taking another look at the form, he asked, with interest, "You're Lucifer Morningstar? The one who owns Lux?" He took the card back from Azrael and began checking out her books, though his attention was on Lucifer.

Lucifer smiled. "That's me," he agreed pleasantly, giving the young man another look. "Stop by Lux any time."

"I'll do that. Maybe tonight."

Azrael took up her books and headed for the door, Lucifer eventually following. "Could you _please_  not seduce all the librarians?" she asked, exasperation coloring her voice.

"Well, how many are there?" Lucifer replied pragmatically. "And is there a number I can seduce that's acceptable to you?" He sounded honestly curious. 

Azrael sighed. "I don't know. It's just that I've been coming here, and it'll get awkward..."

"They did seem to know you," Lucifer commented, opening his trunk for Azrael's books. "Is this where you've been going in the afternoons?"

With a nod, Azrael stowed her books, then closed the trunk. "I tried the pool hall down the street, but it had kind of a weird feel."

Lucifer frowned as the siblings got into the car. "Rae, you do need to be careful," he cautioned.

"What, 'remember, thou art mortal'?" Azrael queried. "I know. That's why I went to the library instead."

In deference to the pedestrians, Lucifer drove at something approaching a reasonable speed. "Just remember what happened the last time Dad sent one of his offspring here as a mortal," he joked.

"My situation is nothing like that," Azrael replied flatly.

"Right," Lucifer agreed. "But you remember what happened, in the end..."

Azrael let the back of her head rest against the seat back, her eyes closing. "I was there, Lucifer."

"Really?"

"Angel of Death. What do you think?" Azrael's tone of voice closed the door on that conversational topic.

Lucifer drove in silence for a moment, then asked, "You're going to the detective's house on Friday? To sleep?"

Azrael nodded. "Going to show Trixie how to bake a chocolate cake." She opened her eyes and added, teasing, "Devil's food."

"What? Now, that's just not right," Lucifer protested. "One of the few things that humanity associates with me that I actually like..."

Laughing, Azrael asked, "What's the matter?"

"I'm not invited, is what," Lucifer replied, wheeling the car into a spot at Lux and popping the trunk. "The detective was very clear on that."

Hopping out of the car and moving to get her books, Azrael said, "Well, it's a girls' night. I'm sure she'll still let you have some cake, though. I doubt we'll eat all of it."

Lucifer shook his head as he tossed his keys to the valet. "You haven't seen how her spawn eats."

"Hey," Azrael protested sharply, trailing behind her brother. "Lay off Trixie."

Lucifer rounded on his sister, brows arched. "I beg your pardon?"

Azrael drew back a step, nearly losing her precarious grip on her books, but met Lucifer's gaze squarely. "That's an insulting word," she said, though her tone softened. "You don't need to call her that."

Lucifer paused, going over his words. "What, spawn? You're getting snippy at me over that?"

"Yes." Azrael exhaled a short, annoyed breath. "Could we keep moving, if you're not going to take my head off? These books are heavy."

"Oh, give them here," Lucifer replied, moving to take the books and then continuing on to the penthouse elevator.

"Thank you." Azrael followed a few steps behind. "Trixie's a good kid," she offered pointedly.

Lucifer sighed. "For a small human, Beatrice is... not awful."

"Thanks, Luci," Azrael replied, with a smile. "I'll be sure to save you some cake."

**Author's Note:**

> I'd love to hear suggestions for ring tones. ;)


End file.
